11/12/08

Eat that yogurt!

I've considered myself to be selectively active in causes that matter to me. And cancer, not just breast cancer, has always scared the bejeesus out of me made me want to be involved. While I was pregnant with Cuppycake, I took a summer course here with a young lady I also went to high school with back when. She had been ill for a while, when they finally realized she had stage 2 liver cancer. She was 21, and she's still getting treated. It's grueling for me to see her going through this, and I admit I probably treat her a bit fragilely, but this post is both my reminder to you all to go get that mammogram, and to save those lids.
Now, I've always saved my yoplait lids.
BUT I have not. ever. sent. them. in.
I actually have an envelope full of them, that I thought I would save up and send from last November, but it turns out, they don't take old ones. I thought they were all the same, but a quick google search says I am WRONG. Basically, only the lids from this period are acceptable, and if they have large tears they won't count. Another very interesting thing I learned is that there are teams (((TEAMS!! YAY!))) for collecting these, and there's probably one in your area. My University actually sponsors a drop box for the lids, which actually makes me much more likely to take them in, because for some reason, eating yogurt is way more fun on campus. I know that many colleges, (as well as cancer hospitals, grocery stores, and dental offices) have one of these boxes.
And because my friend is going through chemotherapy treatments, I wanted to do something special for her as well, even though it's a different type of cancer. I made several of these "warms" to keep her cozy in those otherwise dreary hospital rooms.

Coming soon:my first tutorial, if blogger doesn't eat my photos!

11/6/08

Mamma Pie

I have this extraordinary connection with cuppycake. She’s beautiful, and truly, truly, the life as a momma is good. But.
There’s a darker side, one where I question myself constantly, and fear for her and myself whenever we are apart. I call home, and she is always crying: my happy, bouncy baby, is always screaming when I’m gone. I question her father’s ability to care for her most basic needs, because when she is crying for food, he is trying to put her to sleep. And it’s not just once or twice, I truly believe he just accepts it, and lets her cry.
Which breaks.my.heart.
I’m petrified that something will happen to me and she will have no mamma. I don’t have enough milk stored up for her to last one day on breast-milk because I threw it all out- when her thrush got diagnosed. Even the good stuff, the colostrum from early days (and nights).
I got an IUD at my 6 week check up,and I had to take this little survey to see how I was feeling emotionally, and my midwife kept telling me that if I felt ‘more hormonal’ then to let them know. How do I know if I am ‘more hormonal’ if I am blinded by my own hormonal visions? And I don’t even know how hormonal new moms are, but I do know that when she cries, it tears my heart into little shreds and fills me with panic. But when I am with her, she rarely fusses, much less full-out cries. So when I call, and she is crying, and I can’t reach out and comfort her, or we’re in the car and she gets fussy, I just feel completely miserable, and am truly anxious to be with her to comfort her. I feel like I am standing on a glass panel and it's continuously breaking from under me.
My motherly nature is so much stronger than my energy to be back at school, I really can't focus on doing well, and I am so disappointed that her pappa keeps pushing me to spend time away from her. He says it’s good for me, I just feel so desperately lonesome for my daughter.
Oh, I miss my cuppycake.

10/29/08

One for airplanes

For this post, I wish I had a video to go with. But alas, I do not.
Pappa Starbucks and I have been trying to get back to each other and figure out where we stand in this whole new baby thing. Between in-law’s, school, work, friends, and mentoring, we’ve really let our ‘us’ fade away a little. So tonight, we were kidding around and he tried to kiss me hello when I mentioned that no, really, I haven’t brushed my teeth today, and he was all but you went out? And then I reminded him there was a pack of gum in the car, duh, I wasn't totally unprepared. Some days, it is really that bad. But bad isn’t really the word I am looking for, it’s good. It’s been a wonderful day. I have a paper due tomorrow, dinner to fix for his mother and sister (and a vegan dinner at that, anyone got any tips? I’m tired of making vegetable stir fry : ) ), and a bazillion other things to do, and I just didn’t get around to brushing my teeth. Somewhere in there, we had one of those awkward pauses where we both kind of think...huh...do I really know you(all while I also tried to steal his ice cream with a fork)?
And I was all ambitious and tried to make that cricket noise...you know, the one that they put in cartoons, and it came out sounding like a squashed cow. So we commenced to think of ideal situations to use this hideous noise, and here are our top three NOT in order:
1) In class. Professor says something like “yeah, you know that’s what McCain thinks...” (insert freakish noise here, which is way better for awkward silences than the real thing we think by the way)
2) In the OB’s office, you know what I mean.
3) Tomorrow night at dinner. The whole time.
And so now I have a talent to try to learn and a jammed up noise to keep making because it’s funny, and we are one one closer to being our normal old selves again.

10/28/08

Money baby,money

A few weeks ago, Pappa Starbucks and I were talking about making our lives more user-friendly. We examined our budget, because we’ve been striving hard to manage our money better. And we found some large ways to cut our costs. First, we decided that much of what we do is destructive to our lives instead of constructive.
For example, we both need to eat healthier and take better care of ourselves so that in the long term, we get sick less, and will miss less school or work, and so the baby stays healthier. This means eating better, keeping our home cleaner (getting rid of and collecting less stuff). There are things that we need still and we cannot afford (for example, I need a new post-baby wardrobe for winter), but also, there are things we buy that we do not need (i.e. more pacifiers for the baby).
We also have started eating many more meals at home, and packing food to eat when we leave. He has started drinking more coffee in our kitchen, and much less in his car and at the local *$.The baby needed some hats, and so I made them from old onesies she outgrew instead of dropping $10 for three at Target.
As students, we’re still learning how to manage our money at all, but as new parents, there are a million things we never considered we would need to watch. It’s easy to get caught up in consumerism as new parents: for example, we recently went on a spree of spending, despite the economy’s bad shape. However, it was on a micro level, and our tab only came to about $200. We got the top things we’d been wanting as new parents, and I don’t regret any of them- we thought, and thought about each purchase and resisted a long time. But now that we have them, they DO help us enjoy being new parents more than having that extra $200 sitting in the bank. The purchases?
A car mirror for traveling so Pappa could see the baby when I’m not in the car to soothe her , a Bumbo seat AND tray, even though she’s just 2 months old (we bought that in blue, too, just in case someday we have a boy..). Then there's the Peanut Shell sling for me, something I had wanted since before I had her, and I wish I had got sooner. This isn't a product recommendation, but I will tell you...it was WELL worth it.
The only thing I would have done differently, is, silly me- shopped for these items second hand (like, for example, maybe on Ebay, if I weren't a dim wit). Since they’re all lightweight, I could have probably got them at great prices and shipped cheaply. We did search for coupons online first though!
The other change we are in the process of making is reducing our dependence on plastic grocery bags. I’d like to say it’s all because I’m environmentally conscious, but I really just hate having all those plastic bags taking up space in my kitchen. Currently, we use them for doggy poo...which sucks when they are a bit holy.
The other bit of wisdom we have learned is to earn our credit card points. I never had credit cars before, but now I am learning to use those cards in my advantage. (HOWEVER, we make sure to never, ever, under any circumstance even so much as think about carrying a balance. It's scares me so much to think about getting into debt that I wont use the card if I know we can't go straight home and pay for the item). This means store cards and other kinds, as well as those points’ cards stores give you, which often come with being put on a coupon list as well. Most mailing lists I loathe, but free coupons are always nice if they’re for something I will use. And for the rest, I’ve started sending them to a sister in law, who in turn sends me her unused baby coupons. It’s a win-win for all, except the cat: no one seems to have one, and you’d be surprised how many cat coupons we get each week. Maybe we should start looking for a kitten : )

10/19/08

Baby generator

When I was pregnant with Cuppycake, I always wondered what she would look like. Part of me was horrified and convinced that she would look awful (no, really- I think it’s easy when you’re pregnant to believe you will think your baby is ugly),
And I was also convinced she might not resemble me at all.
I searched high and low for a baby generator- where I could mesh two photos of Pappa Starbucks and myself and find out what she would look like.




I never found one while I was expecting.
And then I forgot about it, simply because, well,she’s beautiful?
And anyway,I can’t imagine feeling any other way than what I do about her!! However, VW (yes, the same people who gave us the jetta and the rabbit) just came out with one. It’s pretty fun, and very cute, and it reminded me of my earlier searches on Google, half frantic, typing “baby maker” or “baby generator” and plowing through the results. This one is fun, though, even if it is to promote a car. It’s called the RoutanBabymaker3000.
Try it. It’s fun, and it will make you grin. I like that it allows you to adjust how much of each parent it adds, and try different photos.