Colorado Kid

Somebody is a natural at living in Colorado. Whenever we go out now, she always grabs a jacket, a water bottle, and a walking stick.

What funny things do your kids do that show their roots?

Wordless Wednesday: "Pappa wear me!"

My audacious nursling

Welcome to the July 2010 Carnival of Nursing in Public


This post was written for inclusion in the Carnival of Nursing in Public hosted by Dionna and Paige at NursingFreedom.org. All week, July 5-9, we will be featuring articles and posts about nursing in public ("NIP"). See the bottom of this post for more information.


***It was in my third trimester that I fell in love with my daughter. Her tiny self nestled inside my womb, she would roil and tumble, acrobatics in the safest place we can ever be. I began feeling connected to her, the realization that she would soon be my girl as I sat in an English class in sweltering summer heat at a rectangular table with my sweet (and radiantly beautiful) friend Jessy, who was sometimes there and sometimes not. I began finally talking to her, singing to her and dreaming of her. I would imagine her at two, at three, at ten. I imagined her smiles and her kisses, her little knees and her sweet curls, fluttering eyelids and precious baby kisses. I read about breastfeeding and mama blogs about natural birth in beat up dog eared copies of Mothering while munching on fiber bars as the other students in my classes read the newest Cosmo articles and IM’d their girlfriends and sipped on latte’s. She would twist and turn and at times I had to leave the class simply because the tumbling was so funny to me that I couldn’t keep from laughing in the middle of our section on grizzly Vietnam poetry.

In my 37th week I made a switch from the University’s Women’s hospital to a midwifery practice five minute’s walk from our then apartment. They loaned me books and encouraged me to attend La Leche League meetings held in their tiny spare room. Meanwhile, my partner stared at me in awe and signed us up for cases of free formula samples and bought huge bottles of ready-made Enfamil for “just in case," and loaded our cabinets with plastic bottles, nipples, and sterilizing microwave bags to clean them all with.

When she was born he held her first. She gnawed on his shoulders searching for sustenance while I received stitches for tearing and cried that I wasn’t pregnant anymore. I was terrified of latching her on that first time and did it while no one else was in the room to hide what I anticipated to be inevitable failure. The midwives had mentioned that they would be there in a few minutes to help us nurse, and so I asked my partner to find me some food. When he left, I curled her against my chest and let her feed as she would. In the coming days, breastfeeding was hard.

We found out later that we had thrush and together we fought that nasty yeast and spun me through phases of depression. The second night of her life, my partner fed her a bottle of formula because when I started feeding her, blood gushed from her umbilical cord. It was old blood from it beginning to dry up, but he convinced me somehow that I must have hurt her while breastfeeding, that I was squishing her stomach, and gave her a bottle. After we realized she was fine, I contacted a La Leche League member who was in our area and she gave me the emotional support via emails that I needed to continue feeding on demand. I began to nurse at the University when she was two weeks old, for my last semester in college. I would feed her in the hallways between classes while young ladies streamed around me and young men gawked, and surely I was awkward still but in my mind those moments were full of elegance. I nursed in the car while he drummed his fingers impatiently at my anxiety about feeding her, because she had a bottle of expressed milk at home and if that wasn’t enough, he could always just give her formula.



I took her with me to a job fair one evening at the University and sat feeding her in a corner when I was approached by the organizer of the event. She told me “this was inappropriate and I needed to leave.” It happened again when I tried to feed her at the gym before heading to a class: “you’re not allowed to do that here.” Both of those times I simply left. It is hard to nurse a squirming baby who wants to know why a stranger is leaning over their mama and making angry faces, so I would leave, hungry babe in arms and try to find a place that wouldn’t disturb anyone, embarrassed. But then one day I finally realized how ridiculous that was. Restrooms are nothing if not filthy and loud, stairwells are terribly uncomfortable and sitting here in this comfortable chair where I was before I started nursing is actually pretty great!

I was literally shocked to learn that I had breastfeeding rights. In most states (my own included) it is legal to breastfeed when and wherever you are as long as you the mother have the legal right to occupy that space. And so I began feeding her wherever I needed to. I nursed her in Target and at the restaurant, at Starbucks and on benches at the park and eventually I found the blessed ERGObaby Carrier that allowed me to breastfeed while walking, while shopping at Old Navy, while traveling abroad on trains and planes and many, many times, sitting in the parked car in the middle of a trip somewhere. It made me feel more justified somehow, to not have to sit down to feed her, to be able to nurse AND pick out tomatoes or breastfeed and walk the dog. She will be two in August and we have nursed across many states and several countries, with obvious results: I have a healthy, thriving, happy, easily comforted, blissful toddler.

I support the rights of breastfeeding mamas because I know how hard it can be to be alone in a room of people who are horrified and offended at your audacity to feed a baby. I have come a long way since I started breastfeeding, but the best sights I’ve seen were not those moments I spent huddled on lidless toilets in uncomfortable and dirty restrooms trying to feed my girl before someone disturbed us with the roar of a toilet in the next stall over-but were the peaceful perfect moments I was able to relax and enjoy her beautiful face as she filled up with breast milk and fell asleep to mama smiling sweetly at her, knowing I had given her everything I possibly could.




Welcome to the Carnival of Nursing in Public


Please join us all week, July 5-9, as we celebrate and support breastfeeding mothers. And visit NursingFreedom.org any time to connect with other breastfeeding supporters, learn more about your legal right to nurse in public, and read (and contribute!) articles about breastfeeding and N.I.P.


Do you support breastfeeding in public? Grab this badge for your blog or website to show your support and encourage others to educate themselves about the benefits of breastfeeding and the rights of breastfeeding mothers and children.

<center> <a href="http://www.nursingfreedom.org/p/carnival-of-nursing-in-public.html" title="Carnival of Nursing in Public"><img src="http://www.babydustdiaries.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/inip1.png" alt="Art by Erika Hastings at http://mudspice.wordpress.com/" border="0"></a></center>

This post is just one of many being featured as part of the Carnival of Nursing in Public. Please visit our other writers each day of the Carnival. Click on the links below to see each day’s posts - new articles will be posted on the following days:

July 5 - Making Breastfeeding the Norm: Creating a Culture of Breastfeeding in a Hyper-Sexualized World

July 6 – Supporting Breastfeeding Mothers: the New, the Experienced, and the Mothers of More Than One Nursing Child

July 7 – Creating a Supportive Network: Your Stories and Celebrations of N.I.P.

July 8 – Breastfeeding: International and Religious Perspectives

July 9 – Your Legal Right to Nurse in Public, and How to Respond to Anyone Who Questions It

ERGObaby Carrier Review (and a chance to win!)

The first time I put on an ERGObaby Carrier, I was surprised at how weighty it felt on my shoulders. My girl was only about six months old and she fit snugly in it, her chin rested on the soft shoulder straps. We borrowed that ERGObaby Carrier for our trip to Europe when she was nine months old, and it was the single best thing we took along. I used it first in the airports when my hands were full of bags and our passports even zipped neatly into the front pocket.

Throughout the trip it continued to serve us more purpose than anything else we took for our daughter. On the blustery streets of London and to the churning Underground, I wore her, up stairwells seven stories deep and through street festivals in Dublin, on to the Tour de Eifel; we wore and wore and wore her. But the best part was that I quickly learned how to breastfeed her in it, saving me countless hours of awkwardly perching in minuscule European restrooms or trying to lull a tired babe to sleep with no bed to lay her on. I happily Nurse in Public whenever she asks to, and the ERGObaby Carrier has become synonymous with breastfeeding for her and I. I simply drop the length of the straps down, lift up my shirt (I like wearing tank tops underneath my blouses for breastfeeding) and she leans to one side and rests her head on my elbow to bliss out on mama milk. One of my absolute favorite breastfeeding moments with her was in a small French garden outside of Paris where I laid the ERGObaby Carrier on the ground as a small blanket and snuggled down beside her to rest and nurse her to sleep. An elderly French lady who didn’t speak a word of English came and sat right next to me, patting her leg and crooning as my girl nursed away.

(our little one has a ride in the ERGObaby Carrier in the Wicklow mountains of Ireland)

Ease of Use: The ERGObaby Carrier isn’t just for adventures though, and it’s truly the one and only carrier you will ever need for your baby. It goes from newborn weight (with an insert) through 40pounds, but they’ve been tested to hold much more than that. I personally can’t imagine my girl being too big for it as she’s almost two and I still wear her. I’m currently a single mama while my partner is away for six weeks this summer and it has liberated me to do things I didn’t know I would struggle doing. Grocery shopping, for example, is difficult when there’s a wee one trying to snack on everything in the cart, and hard enough if there are two adults along. But if I go right during nap time, and put her on my back in the ERGObaby Carrier, she will snooze the trip away. I put her in it again to unload the car and free up both of my hands to grocery bags. And, if she wants a nurse while we’re out, I simply snuggle her into the ERGObaby carrier and pull my blouse aside. She doesn’t need much more encouragement than that to “murse.”

Comfort: At work (I‘m a part-time Nanny), I put her in it when she needs a break or a cuddle) and I’ve had the pleasure of wearing other sweet babes in it too, though my girl does get a bit jealous at seeing other wee ones in “My ERGO!” It is brilliantly comfortable and actually reminds me of a well-fitted backpack. Even my partner enjoys wearing her for snuggles or out at the farmer’s market (to free up his hands for watermelons and fresh strawberries!) as it’s so comfortable and easily adjusted. Another great point is that you can easily wear your child in different positions. My favorite is the front carry, but my partner prefers the back carry. You can also wear it on your hip or wear two at a time (front carry and back carry) if you have more than one little one.

Value: The ERGObaby Carrier is on the pricier side of all carriers I have ever owned, ranging from $120-$148. With that being said, it is truly worth the price, and is also going to last through as many babies as you may be blessed with. I truly love my ERGObaby carrier. It is blissfully soft, sturdy and has allowed me to nurture my babe any and everywhere I go. She asks for it “the ERGO!” by name when she wants a snuggle or a “mursie” and I have loved every minute of having it. It's also probably our most used baby item besides our stash of cloth diapers.

You can visit the ERGObaby website at http://www.ergobabycarriers.com/
ERGObaby has graciously offered one of our Carnival of Nursing in Public participants an ERGObaby carrier (valued between $120 and $148). *Preferred color cannot be guaranteed and is dependent upon stock available.
To enter to win an ERGObaby Carrier, submit an original post to the Carnival of Nursing in Public by June 30th.
Rules for entry – There are 3 ways to be entered in the drawing. You will get one entry for each submission up to 2 drawing entries in each category (you can submit more than 2 items but you will only be entered into the drawing 2 times per category for a maximum total of 6 entries per person). Here’s how to enter:
1. Submit an original post – This should be a well-written, unpublished piece submitted by June 30th using the original post submission webform.
2. Submit a NIP photo – Please submit your picture via email to CodeNameMama {at} gmail {dot} com and BabyDustDiaries {at} gmail {dot} com. You must own rights to share your pictures.
3. Submit a Tweet – Submit your Tweet that shares a NIP tip or bit of encouragement in 140 characters or less using the Tweet submission webform. Be sure to include the #CarNIP hashtag and your Twitter ID in that 140 character count.
Also: please comment to let me know which ERGObaby Carrier you will chose if you win!

Waste not....

I wouldn't really call us frugal. We make lots of careful choices with our money but we also spend a lot on things we value. But we're not wasteful.
Last night at dinner I piled a plate full of lettuce and baby tomatoes, carrot slivers and broccoli for Little Berry and myself. She enjoys dipping her veggies in cream cheese and so I reached for the container to give her a separate dish of it for dipping.
I turned around to find her shaking the rest of the bag of lettuce into the garbage. She looked so proud of herself, like she was helping me. I think in her mind she was being genuinely useful. But it got me wondering:

How do we teach children about not being wasteful?

-Give them age-appropriate tasks they can complete. When we're leaving rooms or the apartment I will pull a chair up to the light switch and ask Little Berry to turn the lights off for me. She enjoys it and it gets her practicing the habit of noticing such things. Make it fun or a game and they will remember it.
In the case of food, I will start involving her more. Perhaps from now on she can be in charge of putting the lettuce into a Tupperware container or picking just as much as we need to eat at a time from our container garden of lettuce.
- Volunteer with them doing something like picking up trash in the park or cleaning out their toy box to take items to a local thrift store. This way they get to see their efforts pay off and see an alternative to simply throwing things away.
-Use less myself and model appropriate behavior. I am guilty of some times pouring a glass of water down the sink if I am finished. We can use that water on our plants or start leaving a bowl of water outside our apartment building for smaller creatures in this summer heat. The fact is- everything we do means something to our children.
-Be wary of what I am modeling as "trash" to my daughter. Recycling is something kids can get involved in and teaching about waste isn't just for the environment. It's ideal for the health of your family as well because your choices will lead to a healthier childhood for your little ones and a better parenthood for you.
-Talk about it, read about it, make up your own stories about it. This one is a given and probably easiest of them all. But just talking about it means nothing if you don't also model the behavior.
-Relax. Sometimes kids are wasteful. They don't comprehend that splashing in the sink is wasteful- to them it's pure bliss to have chilly streams of water everywhere. Sometimes you need to let go of the rules and just enjoy the moment.

What are your tips? How would you approach wastefulness with your child/ren?

The "Little Tyke" Moving Co.

In a few weeks, Pappa Starbucks and I will be moving again. We'll be packing up most of our possessions and putting them in storage for several months while I spend the summer with Little berry and some wonderful family, and he spends the summer working his butt off for Teach For America.
We've done this before. We've moved some four times since we've been together- first from college into an apartment together, then into a bigger apartment where we lived when Little berry was born, and then we stored all of our things for last summer and went to Europe. Then we moved into this apartment and have been here for not quite a year. Moving is hard, especially when you have a little one underfoot. I'm not sure it will ever be easy, but I've found that there are a few things that can make it not as rough.





















(little berry shows her displeasure with our new digs on moving day)

1) Plan ahead- with lists of things that need to be sold/given away, things that need special care or to be returned to friends who've loaned them to you.
2) Try to use up all of the food you can several weeks prior to your move. We make a point to only buy fresh produce for about two weeks before we're moving, so we can use up all the other food.
3) If you can afford it, hire a cleaning crew to come behind you. This can save your deposit and a lot of frustration and energy. Tell them you will tip well if they earn you your deposit back and it will be worth it for both you and them.
4) Check Craigslist and local stores for free boxes. We were out a few weeks ago and saw a local chain restaurant unpacking new chairs and throwing the boxes away- all perfectly sized and identical. No one wants to pack into 40 different sized boxes.
5) Keep boxes handy for items you want to freecycle or take to the thrift store. No one wants to have to dig through already packed boxes for that thing that was going to be given away, nor are you going to want to keep everything.
6) Stock up on tape and markers ahead of time. You're never going to have enough!
7) Leave some boxes empty for the kid to play with while you pack. Maybe throw in a roll of tape. That's what they are going to want most and you don't want to have to keep pulling them out of yours!
8) Enlist friends to help for a few hours or to bring over food and drinks on the day of the move, because you're going to have tossed all that food and moving makes you hungry!

What are your tips for moving with a little one (or more)? I'd love to hear what you do to make moving with kids easier.

Solo Parenting

Welcome to the April Carnival of Natural Parenting: Parenting advice!

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama. This month we're writing letters to ask our readers for help with a current parenting issue. Please read to the end to find a list of links to the other carnival participants.

***

This summer I will be a single parent for 6weeks. Little berry's pappa will be training to be the next Teach For America teacher in a "gruelling six week crash course called institute" that will put him in rural Mississippi, some 12hours away from baby and me. I'm a fairly confident mamma, normally, and I do so love the job, but this...these six weeks?
They have me wrapped up on nerves studded on porcupine quills of terror.

I will need to work because he won't be, which I haven't officially done since my Little berry was born. If you've been here a while, you know I was a full time university student for three semesters after she arrived (and I was back to school full-time just 12 days post partum).

So I need advice. How do single parents handle all the responsibilities of doing things alone? What's the hardest part? What kind of job should I look for where I can be with Little berry (because child care would just eat up the money I made) and still earn rent? How do I honor my parenting philosophies without support?

Any tips or tricks? Also I would love to hear advice on how to I deal with her missing her pappa (she will be 2) for six weeks (and work and live by myself) in the city all at once? Maybe you're a single Mom or were raised by just your dad, maybe you're an army wife or your husband travels a lot...I bet you've got something brilliant to say. Please share with me your advice.

Mammapie

***

Visit Hobo Mama and Code Name: Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

(This list will be updated by the end of the day April 13 with all the carnival links.)

• Replace hitting with…? — Acacia at Be Present Mama is at a loss on how to handle her three year old's hitting.
• Two Questions — Alexandra at Breastfeeding Momma would like some ideas on how to strengthen her bond with her 8-month-old daughter; she's also looking for input on an emotional topic: vaccines.
• Balancing Needs When Baby Trumps Mama — Alison at BluebirdMama wonders how her child's need for noise and energy balances out against her need for quiet and space. (@childbearing )
• The McDilemma — Annie at PhD in Parenting is on the arches of a McDilemma. (@phdinparenting)
• Where is the mutually agreeable solution? When parenting calls for blood draws — Arwyn at Raising My Boychick has a child who needs regular blood tests that are torment for him. How does a parent honor a child when his health is on the line? (@RaisingBoychick)
• When To Wait To Nurse — Cave Mother wonders what age toddlers can be asked to wait to nurse.
• I don't love you Mama! — CurlyMonkey wonders what to do with her daughter's intense feelings. (@curlymonkey_)
• Help a Mama Out — Danielle at Born.in.Japan isn't getting much sleep with her cosleeping, night nursing, cranky little guy and hopes you can help with some suggestions for shuteye. (@borninjp)
• Dear Abby: My daughter really misses her Daddy — Darcel at The Mahogany Way needs to know how to help her daddy's girl get the connection with her father she needs — and not feel left out in the process. (@MahoganyWayMama)
• What's Going on at School? — Deb at Science@home is in a quandary: how can she find out what really goes on at school without stepping on the teacher's toes? (@ScienceMum)
• April Carnival of Natural Parenting: Parenting Advice — Dionna at Code Name: Mama wants to find volunteer work that includes her toddler. (@CodeNameMama)
• How do you deal? — Erin at Beatnik Momma does not want to engage in "mommy wars." She'd like your input on how (and how much) to discuss her natural parenting choices with curious friends and family who parent differently. (@babybeatnik)
• Dear Abby — The Grumbles at Grumbles and Grunts gave her son a banana...and no solid food since. What's the next step in baby-led weaning? (@thegrumbles)
• Excuse me, I have a poop question — Jessica at This is Worthwhile has a question for you about toddler tinkling. (@tisworthwhile)
• The Half Empty Nest Syndrome: What to do when Momma gets replaced by a cow? — Joni Rae at Kitchen Witch Momma is suffering from "half-empty nest syndrome": what do you do when your babies start growing up? (@kitchenwitch)
• Peer Pressure — Kate at Momopoly worries what message her daughter's new friend is sending — but how to break up such an infatuation? (@Momopoly)
• When I Fall Down — Katherine at Momioso.com needs your wisdom on how to be more gentle and at peace with herself. (@naturalparent)
• A question of sleep and sanity — KeepingMumSane needs your toddler cosleeping advice in order to, well, keep mum sane! (@keepingmumsane)

• April Carnival of Natural Parenting: Parenting advice — Lauren at Hobo Mama needs a chiropractor … or help getting her 36 lb toddler to walk up the stairs. (@Hobo_Mama)
• Driver's Ed for Mommies — Maman A Droit is a self-confessed terrible driver and is scared to drive with her baby in the car.
• Solo Parenting — Mammapie at Downside Up and Outside In needs tips for being a single working mother while her partner's away. (@mammapie)
• Itsy Bitsy Biter — Mamapoekie at Authentic Parenting needs your advice about her daughter, otherwise known as the pitbull.
• How Can I Avoid Beauty Obsession? — Melodie at Breastfeeding Moms Unite! is at a loss ever since her tomboys turned into wannabe princesses. (@bfmom)
• Seeking Stability in Chaos — Michelle at Seeking Mother is in a heart-wrenching position. She needs your input on how to make a toddler feel secure during a time of transition, the illness of a parent, and multiple (new) caregivers. (@Seekingmother)
• Mama, That's Too, Too Boring! — Michelle at The Parent Vortex started out asking how to encourage her preschooler to get dressed — and four days later, she began to without prompting! (@TheParentVortex)
• Dear Lovey Hart, I am Desperate. — Mommy Soup from Cream of Mommy Soup has several questions for you, from how you play favorites when no one's your favorite to how to tell off strangers curious about the ample size of your family. (@mommysoup)
• Diaper Duty Dilemma — Paige at Baby Dust Diaries has a simple request: talk to her about cloth! (@babydust)
• What Do You Need My Son — pchanner at A Mom's Fresh Start wishes her calm four-month-old hadn't turned into an inquisitive and dramatic six-month-old. How do you handle changes in baby's personality? (@pchanner)
• Dear Natural Parenting Community — Sarah at OneStarryNight wants to know how to respond to criticism from family and friends over breastfeeding. (@starrymom)
• Natural Parenting Carnival — Help — Sarah at Consider Eden feels like either her to-do list or her parenting is suffering, because she can't do both! (@considereden)
• To potty learn or not to potty learn — that is the question — Sheryl at Little Snowflakes wants to know whether it's time to start potty training. (@sheryljesin)
• Seeking Patience — Starr at Earth Mama looks to the collective tribal wisdom of this community to learn how to teach patience to children.
• A Dirty Girl Comes Clean — Tashmica at Mother Flippin' is struggling. How do parents deal with their inability to keep their children protected from danger? (@Mother_Flippin)
• Uli and the Pussy Cats — Thomasin at Propson Palingenesis has a toddler who likes to put kitties in headlocks and ride them like horsies. How best to separate the little beasties?
• Perceptions of Discipline — Zoey at Good Goog doesn't use conventional discipline with her child — and doesn't know how to respond around people who do. (@zoeyspeak)

raising a wild child

We love the outdoors. We don't have a lot of wild place to explore, but I want my Little berry to see that the world is beautiful. She notices the littlest things, a tiny bug, a bee on a leaf, a golden flower smashed underfoot. This week we played under the blossoming trees and built tiny houses for imaginary fairies, butterflies, snails.
I know she doesn't understand the concept of "imaginary," but she concentrates so hard helping. She fetches grasses and sticks with precision, plucks tiny violets and pebbles out of the way, waits for an ant to cross before stepping.
Here is where we started:
And when we finished, we had this tiny teepee of twigs:

capped with a lovely golden flower and a million brilliant rays of sun
Waiting to spin a little mystery into the everyday of some unsuspecting soul.

What have you taken the time to build with your child lately? Next time you're in the park, I challenge you to pause, find a small space, and make a fairy home (take pictures and share them with me if you do!)

Thanksgiving

Right now little berry is hard asleep on my lap
in a way she hasn't done since we were in Europe.
I am watching barefoot contessa thanksgiving episodes
and salivating at all the yummy food. The truth is,
I love food. It has given me lots of pleasure over
time but my tastes have changed quite
A bit through time too. When I was littler, I could eat
ham sandwiches with banana slices on them all
day long. Or tomato sandwiches with American
cheese slices. Pappa Starbucks is vegetarian
though, and since we began living together we
both began eating healthier. We go through the vegetables
in this house although they're rarely eaten raw. I used
to eat lots of easy foods and he ate lots of "vegetarian junkfood"
so it's nice to come to enjoy eating healthier
together. On our thanksgiving menu this year is:
roasted carrots
Stuffed mushrooms with vegetarian sausage 
Quorn vegetarian turkey
mashed potatoes of course....
bread
cranberry sauce by pappa starbucks
mmmmmmm! Happy thanksgiving!!